How To Forgive Yourself And Move Forward? But For Real This Time

Forgiving yourself is a process that involves a true desire to heal your heart. Here’s how to accept what happened and embrace the art of self-forgiveness.

You’ve been trying for so long to move on with your life, but the past mistakes you made keep haunting you and you’re struggling to forgive yourself.

Even though it’s not easy to forgive, it’s possible. Most of us would be willing to forgive someone who truly regrets their deeds. Or forgiving someone who fully explained to us their actions. Or forgiving a person that gives us a satisfying compensation. We forgive them, brush it off, and then move on.

Though we don’t delete it or forget it, we don’t hold it against them anymore.

But there’s one person that we can’t forgive at all. We remember all that he or she did. All the mistakes that happened many years ago. We keep reminding him or her of that over and over again until it prevents them to evolve and develop and actualize their life. And this person is you.

It’s easier to forgive someone else than forgiving yourself. Because you expect so much more of yourself. And it’s easier to punish yourself. Quietly. Repeatedly. When no one sees or hears.

You want to put all that was done behind you, but the memories and guilt take over you. Self-forgiveness seems like a foreign concept that can work well for others but never for you.

Forgiving yourself is a skill you need to practice, just like driving a car or playing the piano. It’s not an innate instinct we were born with.

It’s something you need to develop through awareness and patience.

Guilt, which is the negative motive behind your difficulty to forgive yourself is also not an emotion we’re born with, it’s something we learn. We were taught to feel guilty early on in childhood, otherwise, we’re bad.

On the other hand, compassion is a natural state of ours. We are social creatures and we’re biologically programmed to contribute to one another.

So if we learn to master self-compassion, our inborn state, forgiving ourselves will be a lot easier and faster than we imagine.

Why Is It So Hard For You To Forgive Yourself

There are a few reasons that are responsible for your refusal to forgive yourself.

First, you might have this unhealthy tendency to be too hard on yourself. Over the years, self-criticism has turned to be a part of your identity.

So you view your past actions or words towards the person you were wronged as much worse than other people’s cases. In other words, you think that “what I did is not similar to what others did. My case is much different and complex than anyone else’s”.

Because you’re so harsh on yourself, you might believe that you don’t even deserve forgiveness. You are convinced that you were such a horrible person then, that in this round of life, you are not worthy enough to give yourself the forgiveness your soul needs so badly.

Second, you unconsciously don’t want to forgive yourself because you are afraid that if you will end up forgiving yourself — that means that the hurt you caused is meaningless. In other words –it means you don’t care about the pain and the suffering that was caused to the other person.

Third, you want to view yourself as a good person. So if you sustain the misery cycle and not forgive yourself long enough, that will make you the nice person you wish to be.

Obviously, these toxic psychological reasons are false thoughts and they don’t represent the truth.

The truth is — forgiveness is necessary. It’s necessary for you and for those you hurt deliberately or unintentionally.

Life encourages growth. We are here to thrive and expand.

Not forgiving yourself, goes against the purpose of life.

Lack of self-forgiveness makes you wilt inside, decline slowly, and repressing your greatness.

Deterioration and degeneration are the opposite of the natural course of life, which is the strive for growth.

And besides, no amount of pain will make you a better person. No amount of shame and self-blame will make you nicer or kinder to humanity.

On the contrary, you’re a much better person to society when you feel empowered and strong within.

Only then you can contribute, be a source of happiness to others, rather than a source of pain.

Start Forgiving Yourself One Step At a Time

Deep down, despite your internal resistance to forgive yourself, you do want to see if there’s a way you achieve it.

After all, you’ve been seeking that relief for quite a while.

You’ve been carrying that emotional baggage for long enough and it’s getting heavier and heavier as days pass by.

So your curiosity brought you here, searching for ways to provide yourself forgiveness and at the same time, feel comfortable with that move.

Here is how you can forgive yourself with ease, without feeling like you’re a selfish person for doing that.

I’ve created a special meditation formula that is designed to help you forgive yourself and quit the toxic cycle of guilt and self-blame.
Get instant access here.

You Did The Best You Could

When you caused pain and hurt to others, especially those you love the most, you had no other choice.

Yes, you read it right.

Back then, you did what you did or said what you said, based on the skillset you had.

Now, you wouldn’t do it again because you learned. You know better now. You’re smarter now.

But back then — you were limited. So you did your best based on your limited personal skills, insights, and knowledge.

If you keep reminding yourself of that simple truth, you’ll start developing compassion towards yourself. As your compassion state grows deeper, self-forgiveness will follow.

We come to this world to learn and to evolve.

See, we don’t know much when we go through life. But then, we learn through experience.

In this learning process, we end up hurting people, especially those that are we most care about.

And yes, we leave scars in others’ hearts. In ours too.

But we had no choice, we didn’t know any better then. But we do now.

Life is a learning curve, always teaching us new lessons, showing us what’s right and how to treat the people we love. And we learn these lessons mainly through mistakes.

There’s no other way around it.

You did the best you could then. So it’s time to cut yourself some slack and forgive yourself.